


A Great Big Void

by Zoe_Grimm



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Bellamione - Freeform, F/F, Fluff and Angst, POV Narcissa Black Malfoy, Patronus, Post Wizarding War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-24
Updated: 2017-07-24
Packaged: 2018-12-06 08:57:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11597328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zoe_Grimm/pseuds/Zoe_Grimm
Summary: Hermione is teaching Bellatrix and Narcissa the patronus charm, and while Bella succeeds, her sister keeps struggling...





	A Great Big Void

_"Expecto Patronum."_

Narcissa stared wistfully at the few wisps of silvery smoke that her wand had managed to produce. They evaporated into thin air right along with her last hopes of ever mastering this spell.

"You need to think of something happy.", a gentle voice told her.

Hermione had been teaching her and Bella all afternoon. But Narcissa had been searching her memory over and over, turning her own thoughts to shreds and coming up with nothing. Her hand stayed perfectly still as she raised her wand to hide her inner turmoil, but the result was still the same: nothing.

Bella was doing a lot better. She was always doing better. She had set to this new form of magic with the same dedication she invested in any dark curse, pouring her whole soul into her fingertips until a bright silver figure burst from the wand underneath them.

"Ha!" She triumphed, those dark eyes lighting up from the inside with the certainty of victory, as her crow patronus circled over her head. She touched the bird's skull hanging from her neck and then fell into her lover's arms.

"You did it", Hermione whispered, and Narcissa didn't think that she was meant to hear, or see, as Hermione and Bella kissed in a way that started from innocence and led up to sin fairly quickly. Narcissa politely turned away and cleared her throat.

"Oh please, Cissy, as if you hadn't seen worse!", Bella declared, upset at the interruption but happy enough to maintain her patronus.

"Unintentionally!", Narcissa exclaimed, remembering the one time she had inadvertedly walked in on her older sister and her decidedly younger lover.

"As if you hadn't DONE worse,   _INTENTIONALLY!",_ Bella amended, and Narcissa felt a slight flush creep up her neck and colour her cheeks. Being bisexual and in an open marriage with Lucius made up for a life that could be quite... adventurous at times, but of all the people her sister could have seen her with, it had to be Ginny Weasley. She had had to bribe Bella with Weird Sisters tickets and Honeydukes treats for weeks so that she wouldn't tell Draco or Harry. The thought of what her son-in-law might say to her if he ever found out she had hooked up with his ex-girlfriend was enough to give her nightmares.

She lifted her wand to keep practicing and distract herself from the unwanted thoughts. Both Harry and, after Harry had taught him, Draco, had offered to teach her the spell, but she had declined. She still felt a little awkward around Harry at times and she didn't want her son to see her fail. Draco would ask her for a memory and wonder why any moment spent with him wasn't good enough, didn't make her happy enough. It would break his heart because he wouldn't _understand._ Her memories of him scared her more than anything.

"What were you thinking of?", Hermione asked Bella, the words spoken softly and at the same time loud enough to rip Narcissa from her reverie. She looked at her sister, curious.

"The first time you came to Malfoy Manor.", Bellatrix replied, and Narcissa's curious look turned into an incredulous stare.

"You  _tortured_ her on that day! You could have killed her, any of them could have died, and that makes you  _happy?!"_ Narcissa exclaimed.

"Think it through, Cissy", Bellatrix challenged and continued, "first of all, me and Mione got  _very_ close that day, second nobody died that I care about and even though Mione made my life a living hell for killing that elf, I APOLOGISED, and third, they escaped, didn't they? And the moment you were gone", Bella said, turning around and wrapping her arms around Hermione's neck, "was the happiest moment of my life because I knew then that you would make it."

There was something like magic between Bella and Hermione as they kissed, a warm sensation of fluttering wings and heartstrings that  _tugged_ painfully on something inside Narcissa's chest, a hollowness where a love like theirs should have been. A great big void. She closed her eyes and thought of her son, growing up in a world that had Lord Voldemort still in it, a world that threatened to keep turning without him as he turned to the dark arts. He could have died too many times to ever make her  _happy._ He and Harry had gotten married right after the war, and yes, she had been happy for him then, but she was still scared. She opened her eyes to find Hermione and Bella looking at her.

"Maybe we should keep trying tomorrow?", Hermione asked hesitantly, and Narcissa nodded. She could think of something until tomorrow. And if she still couldn't find the right memories, she would simply have to make them.


End file.
